Thank you

Every year, without fail since I've known him, noman, a dear friend and secret lover of mine sends a birthday gift. I'm sorry, noman, but this year, well, it was a bit of a distance enjoyment.

So, after this email exchange with my mum, my dad dropped an email that if I'm still online, could they Skype with me for my birthday? I said sure and got on Skype. Went to call them, and, ironically, dialed Mr FD instead. (We had chatted for an hour and half before hand.) We laughed and laughed and I apologized - total Freudian slip to call my Daddy when I meant to call my dad. So funny!

Then, dad and mom called. The screen was all weird and pixely with funky rainbow colors. I could hear them but could not see them. Must be the laptop. Hit it a few times while they kept saying, "Hello? Hello? Hello?" Then, I hung up the call and called back. Same screen visual and they told me to just wait a second. All of a sudden, they came into view behind a piece of paper and sang the complete version of Happy Birthday to You. I laughed. I cried. It was so sweet and silly of them (unlike them actually). I laughed so hard.

Then, they showed me the package from Amazon. It was big. They said it felt heavy. Having looked over at my kinky Lola Amazon wishlist page, seeing that my address for the wishlist was France, I figured that anything in the box must be from the other safe Lola family-friendly wishlist. I asked my mum if she'd gotten my last email, that I wasn't doing anything shady or .. she finished my sentence "harmful to children or pets." Ok, so, well, there you go, dad, now you know I'm bisexual. Hahahah I was laughing. He said I was getting too silly (his way of dealing with uncomfortable levels of open expression, I guess).

So, they opened it. I asked who it was from. They said noman. Ohhh, noman! Such a good friend that I know from Madison. What a sweet friend to send a gift for my birthday!! Mum held up the first book, Revolutionary Road, and then the second book,



















Oh, I started to laugh and laugh.

Dad picked up the card again and I said I wasn't sure if he should read it out loud - did he want to read it? I was laughing. He was smiling but being serious and "Sure. It's nice. Here, listen." He read it.

First, my birth name is not Lola. Indeed, it's something different. Dad read this. "Dear Lola - is Lola you?" I was still laughing. "Yes." "Because if it's not you, maybe these gifts go to someone else?" He was smiling.

noman had recently read Revolutionary Road and thought I'd like it. noman had read some of my writing lately and thought I might like the Secret Identity book, as well.

What a sweet friend, I sighed.

My parents quickly changed the subject after the gift opening and we moved to talk about lawn de-thatching, birthday day tomorrow, and laughed again about their surprise birthday song to me. Pretty gutsy and cool for Midwestern folk. And, so damn sweet and nice and thoughtful of noman. He's meant a lot to me over time but I never thought we'd still be friends for this long. Thank you, noman. No worries on the how it happened. It ... just so happens. And it's probably a destiny waiting to happen, actually, that my parents get eased into Lola and my lifestyle. After all, I do aim to write a book or three on the matter and would rather a toe-inching-into-the-pool than a grand dame of heart attacks.

Thank you again, noman. Really. They'll be shipping the books tomorrow so I get them before end of month. I'm so looking forward to seeing them on my shelf and reading them.

You gave me a belly ache of laughter and some tears of joy. What a great way to start a new year of life!

So much love to you.

xoxoxo

Lola
with a Secret Identity